“Let me tell you something about life; you always finish what you start.”
“He had an amazing ability to look at a problem and sort of push the clouds away from it.”
“Despite what the last fifty years of American policy would suggest, ‘They hit us so we’re hitting back’ is not a military strategy. I was taught that successful wars are waged for measurable goals. What’s the goal here? I’d really like to know. What does victory look like?”
“Rutherford tried to distract himself from the odor. He thought about how he would describe the smell later. Imagine how your hands would smell if you bought fifty pounds of past-due-date ground beef and paid for it entirely with pennies.”
The Academy asked me to hold off on my predictions for the 2016 Academy Awards until tonight so I wouldn’t influence the voters.
“If Nikola Tesla was Writing a Self-Help Book, These are the Six Things You Would Learn:
#6. Avoid being abducted by an evil being who’s bent on destroying the multiverse. Self-explanatory.”