There’s practically no end of bad things about this movie, most of all the fact that I’ve seen it more than once. I’m a sucker for rom-coms.
What’s more:
I appreciate “actors” like Matthew Lillard; they let you know right away which movies to avoid. He’s like the modern Louis Gossett, Jr. If you want to find everything wrong with teen movies all at once…
God, this story is absolutely awful. How hard was this? It was a great play when it was Pygmalion, it was a better play when it was My Fair Lady. All you had to do was update slightly for the modern teen audience. Instead it was so badly botched that they had to hire M. Night Shyamalan to doctor the thing. It didn’t work.
If this story of mean rich teens wasn’t unlikable enough, they’ve cast it with actors who probably can’t even remember what high school was like, it was so long ago. And they cast TWO rappers – no movie can overcome that!
I don’t know who’s time is being most wasted here, Anna Paquin or Dulé Hill. This thing makes every wrong decision you can make. What a perfectly dreadful picture…
I’m quickly becoming a big fan of Patrick McLean’s writing. I tore through the How to Succeed in Evil series, really enjoying the concept of an “evil efficiency consultant” very much as he turns the superhero genre on its head, letting the bad guy take the wheel.
His latest, The Merchant Adventurer, similarly reverses the roles in another genre, that of fantasy adventuring. Anyone who has seen Lord of the Rings will be familiar enough with the genre, but those who have read fantasy novels or rolled the dice in a role-playing game (RPG), electronic or board, will really enjoy this most. In fact, the author based the protagonist on a computer-played RPG character from the game Wizardry.
Boltac is a shopkeeper; the guy who kits you out when you go out on your quest for fortune and glory. He theoretically is also the guy you sell your loot to if you ever return from your adventure (doubtful). He’s seen them all come and go – bold young heroes off to defeat the dread so and so and rid the land of this and that and recover the lost treasure of whatever. He nods politely, sells them the gear for exactly what it’s worth and never expects to see any of them ever again. He is Rick Blaine in Casablanca; he sticks his neck out for nobody.
But when the local wizard gets a little too ambitious and kidnaps the innkeeper of Boltac’s dreams, he feels compelled to act; not to be the hero, but to use his own strengths to get her back. And save the town, if possible. And not to be killed by either the cut-throat guide or the idiot kid hero who tags along.
The novel is a great satire. It helps if you are fluent in the genre, but really you don’t have to have read any of those books with characters with too many consonants in their names to enjoy the story. Boltac is a fun character to follow and if the end destination of the story isn’t really in doubt, the many paths and stops on the way are entirely unexpected and great.
Kiki’s Delivery Service takes place in a world that is familiar yet seemingly more pleasant. For one thing, no one seems uneasy with the idea of witches flying around; it’s nearly commonplace. The story also takes place in a beautiful seaside city that seems generically European, combining the best elements of all of the major cities. I usually do some reading after watching a film and before writing about it (so I don’t influence my opinion of the film on first viewing), and I found comments by Miyazaki that he intended this to be set in a n alternate 1950’s Europe where no world wars had ever taken place.
So Kiki is born into an idyllic time, and when she turns thirteen, like all young witches, she is to go off and live alone for one year in training. It’s a perfect vehicle to examine how young girls explore their independence & no one writes for young girls better than Miyazaki.
Kiki’s constant companion is her cat, Jiji, who helps her work through her growing pains as she attempts to make a home for herself in the big city. Jiji speaks to Kiki but no one else. I asked why this was so and received a nasty look from my daughter, so just go with it.
Kiki finds the townspeople ill-disposed to a young witch, but after performing a small service for a local baker, finds herself a home and the means to start up a local delivery service. As she can make deliveries via flying broomstick, she seems to have made a good career choice, as long as she can sort out her feelings for a local boy.
Kiki’s Delivery Service is a fun little movie. It’s colorfully designed and beautifully realized. It’s not as serious or weird as some of Miyazaki’s movies, yet not as layered or ambitious either. It might be a good introduction to the style for newcomers. It’s very enjoyable.
As with all of the English dubbed films, it’s a mixed bag. While Kiki doesn’t have any of the serious cultural themes that get lost in translation, there may be subtleties lost in the subtitles.
The voice acting is unremarkable, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Kirsten Dunst does a credible job voicing a thirteen year old, as she wasn’t much older at the time, and she isn’t bad, which is usually the best you can hope for from her. Janeane Garofalo is also in it. Take everything I just said about Dunst and repeat.
Jiji the cat, is voiced in the US dub by Phil Hartman. While I absolutely love Hartman, it’s sort of an unfortunate choice, as they went for a very sarcastic approach that apparently isn’t consistent with the original Japanese version. The film was one of his last, released posthumously and dedicated to him.
I’d heartily recommend Kiki to Miyazaki newbies, particularly young girls and their families.
A young witch, on her mandatory year of independent life, finds fitting into a new community difficult while she supports herself by running an air courier service.
Batman turned 75 years old earlier this year (2014). In recognition, we are rebranding our site for one week to Now Very Bat… and focusing on the blockbusters, the smaller films, the comics and the video games that feature the Dark Knight.
140 Character Movie Review – #140RVW
Holy 75th birthday, Batman! Let’s do the Batusi to the film version of the wildly popular camp tv show. As good today as it was then. Umm…
Spoiler-free Movie Review of Batman: The Movie:
This is probably hard to explain if you didn’t grow up with it. A tv then film treatment of the darkest comic hero of all time with a huge, campy garishly approach. It’ll be purposefully ridiculous and mocking of the whole franchise. So that means it must have been awful, right? Well, actually…
“Some days, you just can’t git rid of a bomb.”
Look, if you grew up watching the Tim Burton Batman movies, or the Christopher Nolan films, or any of the great animated shows, you’re probably not going to get the appeal of the Batman 1960’s tv show. But trust me, it was really funny. It wouldn’t work today, but at the time it was hugely popular whether you were an adult who got how absurd it was trying (and succeeding) to be, or if you were a kid who was just happy to see Batman & Robin mix it up on tv.
“You cowardly kitten! You want to live forever?”
They first tried to make the movie to kickoff the tv series, but the studio wouldn’t foot the bill, so they ended up making the motion picture after the first season of the show.
“Holy polaris!”
The plot, such as it is, concerns four of Batman’s greatest super-villains (Catwoman, Joker, Riddler & Penguin) teaming up to take out the Caped Crusader and take over the world by, ahh, who cares.
“It’s a low neighborhood, full of rumpots. They’re used to curious sights, which they attribute to alcoholic delusions.”
The delight in Batman: The Movie comes two-fold: the hilarious script and the hilariously awful acting. The casting follows that of the tv show, and is brilliant.
“Holy jumble! Where’s the hope of the world now?”
Adam West as Batman – even more affected, over the top and easily imitated than William Shatner’s Captain Kirk delivery, if such a thing is possible.
“Holy bikini!”
Burt Ward as Robin – holy <insert acting noun here>, Batman!
“We shall spring them from The Joker’s Jack-In-The-Box, through that window, out over the sea, and into the waiting arms of The Penguin’s Exploding Octopus!”
Cesar Romero as the Joker – forget what Heath Ledger did with the character, Romero showed his commitment to the role by not even bothering to shave off his mustache…
“Holy nightmare!”
Burgess Meredith as the Penguin – for many people he IS the Penguin. One of those performances that seems like it leapt straight off the comic book page.
“Disposing a pre-atomic submarines to persons who don’t even leave their full addresses… Good day, Admiral!”
Lee Meriwether as Catwoman – she replaced Julie Newmar from the show. Ehh, I still prefer Eartha Kitt.
“How was I to know they’d have a can of shark-repellent Bat-spray handy?”
Frank Gorshin as the Riddler – really got into the spirit of the thing, maybe too much. He’s intensely manic and may not have realized this wasn’t a serious gig.
Commissioner Gordon: “What weighs six ounces, sits in a tree and is very dangerous?” Robin: “A sparrow with a machine gun!”
The writing by Lorenzo Semple Jr. is simply spectacular. In addition to writing the pilot and first four episodes of the show, he remained Executive Story Editor for all of the first season and wrote the film. He must have used up every joke for the rest of his life in that first year, as he would go on to make serious pictures for the rest of his career.
“Holy heart failure, Batman!”
I can think of no funnier way to celebrate the 75th anniversary of the release of the first Batman comic than to watch Batman: The Movie…
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