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Reviews

X-Men: The Last Stand (2006)

#140RVW

Not as good as you’d hoped, not as bad as you’ve been told. Not Ratner-bashing, but really would’ve been interesting to see Singer’s take…

X-Men: The Last Stand

What’s more:

Whatever your opinion of Superman Returns, it is unquestionable that it really hobbled X-Men: The Last Stand. Coming off of the critically and commercially successful X2, the third X-Men movie was poised to be a solid follow-up, with the same cast & crew. Then Bryan Singer got a better offer – reboot Superman. Sinking feeling begins…

Look, blaming Singer is plain unfair; you should never begrudge someone the chance to accept a promotion, and I don’t care what you say, X-Men is not on the same level as Superman. Yeah, I said it…He wanted to move on to what appeared to be a great opportunity. Sadly, it didn’t really work out for either franchise.

X-Men: The Last Stand

Still, this should have been a slam dunk. While Singer hadn’t planned out the storyline for the third film, the ending of X2 all but ensured we were headed into Dark Phoenix territory, so the story should have written itself. So they have the raw materials: a Claremont Classic (mixed in with a Whedon story arc), the same cast, and pots of money.

Search for a new director; directors who turned down the job included Darren Aronofsky, Joss Whedon, Alex Proyas & Zack Snyder. They hired director Matthew Vaughn, but he left the film. Sinking feeling intensifies. They replaced him with Brett Ratner. And we’re sunk. I know that is unfair to Ratner. I don’t really know why he is so reviled. He seems like a perfectly average director – nothing to write home about, sure, but not incompetent. I suppose it has more to do with the feeling that an A-list director was replaced with a utility infielder.

X-Men: The Last Stand

A further problem is that Fox was developing the Wolverine “solo” film at the same time as this movie. You can’t serve two masters successfully, and this was no exception. They didn’t want to use certain characters in this movie and not have them for Wolverine’s movie. Danger…

So, after that long introduction, how is X-Men 3? Not bad, really. At times it’s excellent.

X-Men: The Last Stand

Here’s everything good about it:

  • Angel – great effects lead to some great visuals
  • Casting Kelsey Grammer as Hank McCoy/Beast. Hold your hand up if you thought this was a good idea. That makes one. This seemed a horrible idea that I am only too happy to eat crow on and applaud. Frasier has got game…
  • The storyline(s): both the Dark Phoenix and the Cure arcs are great stuff and welcome.
  • Appearance of film version of Dr. Moira MacTaggert, making my daughter Moira smile…

X3

Here’s everything that isn’t:

  • Digital de-aging, also known as “digital skin-grafting”; this technique needs to go sit in the corner until it’s ready to play with the other modern visual effects. It’s time-consuming, expensive, looks like crap, and has convinced older actors that they can continue to monopolize roles that should go to newer actors. The “success” of this technique led Brian Cox to insist that he could play Stryker in the Wolverine spin-off. C’mon, son…
  • Cinematographer Newton Thomas Sigel is an artist – he left after X2 (Singer brought him over to Superman Returns; seeing a trend here?) He is replaced by Dante Spinotti, who is certainly talented, but I think he was given confusing direction here. It doesn’t help that he himself is a replacement for Philippe Rousselot, who left during shooting. Spinotti then had to leave the project before the end of photography, so J. Michael Muro completed it. See what I mean about the confusing look of the film?
  • Where the hell did Rogue go? Was Anna Paquin double-parked or something? She was in this movie for seemingly seconds. Considering how much these movies obsess over “Best Actress” Berry, you’d think they’d recall that Paquin actually earned her Oscar and utilize her as much as humanly possible.
  • As a love interest she is replaced with Ellen Page as Kitty Pryde/Shadowcat. That’s the third Kitty actress in three movies. Page is really not bad, I’m just including her here because the character is simply not as interesting as Rogue.
  • Singer took James Marsden with him, so Cyclops is relegated to a small role, barely more than a cameo. Guess they shouldn’t have cut all his scenes in X2, huh?
  • Rebecca Romijn had to accept a reduced role because of scheduling conflicts caused by the film being rushed into production. This happens WAY too much. Studios are so focused on certain release dates that they push the creative process past breaking. The breakneck pace likely had impact on the movie’s one-dimensional tone than any mismanagement by Ratner. I suspect he did the best he could; Vaughn admitted that one of the reasons he left the project is that there would not be time to complete the film properly. Really drives home the insight of Ben Burtt; “Films aren’t released, they escape.”
  • Berry managed to bully her way into nearly every scene, but thankfully was still not allowed to drive on camera – they wanted to keep casualties to a minimum…
  • Um, every single new mutant. Juggernaut is a dumb character, so I guess we can’t fault the fun Vinnie Jones for that. But what pop band did they raid for the rest of these people? When I see characters/actors this bad in a movie I usually assume they are rappers, even if they aren’t. Callisto, Psylocke, Arclight & Kid Omega (I had to look these up; they deservedly don’t even get named in the film) look like a multi-gendered, multi-cultural boy band; you know, during the “edgy” part of their career.
  • With so many decades of comic characters to choose from there are there no better choices? Maybe my opinion that Marvel has crap villains is actually true. Scary…
  • Also, it’s just sad that they always have to struggle with the problem of how to let Wolverine slash his way through lots of people without actually killing anyone important. In the previous movies they could always pull in nameless, faceless soldiers. But here in the forest, there’s nothing but mutants. Yet they seemingly have no powers unless looking non-descript and getting gutted without putting up a fight is some new mutation. They only gave him one guy with powers to actually fight (Spike). Why couldn’t he have killed some of the hair gel squad?
  • Why is Nightcrawler not in this movie?
Poster:

Trailer:

Bechdel Test:

Pass

Main Cast Patrick Stewart Charles Xavier/Professor X, Hugh Jackman Logan/Wolverine, Halle Berry Ororo Munroe/Storm, Famke Janssen Jean Grey/Phoenix
Rating PG-13
Release Date Fri 26 May 2006 UTC
Director Brett Ratner
Genres Action, Adventure, Sci-Fi, Thriller
Plot When a cure is found to treat mutations, lines are drawn amongst the X-Men, led by Professor Charles Xavier, and the Brotherhood, a band of powerful mutants organized under Xavier’s former ally, Magneto.
Poster X-Men: The Last Stand
Runtime 104
Tagline Take a Stand
Writers Simon Kinberg (written by) &, Zak Penn (written by)
Year 2006

February 21, 2014Filed Under: #WWMD, Movies, Reviews Tagged With: 2006

Stand By Me (1986)

#140RVW

EXACTLY as good as you remember it being. Probably more affecting if like me, you were close to the characters’ age when you first saw it…

Stand By Me

What’s more:

A mostly faithful adaptation of Stephen King’s novella “The Body”, Stand By Me  was a sleeper hit when it came out in 1986. They were fortunate to even get the movie made, as it had financing trouble. No one expected it to be a success. What were people not seeing in this picture? A coming of age movie based on a story by the most popular author alive? How could this NOT have been a hit?

Stand By Me

Well, hindsight and all that. The fact is that Rob Reiner hadn’t yet become a bankable director and while all of these child actors were full of promise, many careers don’t pan out. In truth, the casting of Wil Wheaton, River Phoenix, Corey Feldman and Jerry O’Connell was inspired and is almost entirely the reason the film became an instant classic.

Stand By Me

The movie is set in 1959, but it would be engaging set at just about any time. The nostalgia is great and the setting certainly makes the story work very well, but the core issues of friendship, growing up, finding your place, grief, loss – these are what make this film so engaging and keep it fresh to people of any age or background.

Stand By Me

Enough cannot be said about the dialogue. King is a great writer in large part because he creates believable dialogue for real people, and screenwriters Raynold Gideon & Bruce A. Evans wisely import entire exchanges from the book even as they add their own touches in the same spirit.  The banter between the boys on this trip will be instantly familiar to most people, enough so that it seems as if the writers were listening in on your conversations as you wandered around town with your friends.

Stand By Me

Occasionally the exchanges can seem a bit adult, the insights from characters Chris Chambers and Gordie Lachance rather sophisticated. But the acting by River Phoenix & Wil Wheaton, respectively, sells it. Some kids are wise beyond their years, and some actors possess talents surpassing their experience. Feldman and O’Connell (in his first role) are really very good, as well, but it is no slander to say that they are bit players next to Phoenix & Wheaton.

Stand By Me

Interesting choice to move the story (and filming) from Castle Rock, Maine to Oregon. The scenery is great and the photography is very good, if a bit too soft for me. It’s so intentionally made to seem nostalgic and timeless that it’s a little over-the-top, but certainly achieves the look they were going for.

Stand By Me

Reiner really did a marvelous job; this is a tremendous film.

Poster:

Trailer:

Bechdel Test:

Fail

Main Cast Wil Wheaton Gordie Lachance, River Phoenix Chris Chambers, Corey Feldman Teddy Duchamp, Jerry O’Connell Vern Tessio
Rating R
Release Date Fri 08 Aug 1986 UTC
Director Rob Reiner
Genres Adventure, Drama
Plot After the death of a friend, a writer recounts a boyhood journey to find the body of a missing boy.
Poster Stand by Me
Runtime 89
Tagline For some, it’s the last real taste of innocence, and the first real taste of life. But for everyone, it’s the time that memories are made of.
Writers Stephen King (novel), Raynold Gideon (screenplay) …
Year 1986

February 20, 2014Filed Under: Movies, Reviews Tagged With: 1986

Miracle (2004)

#140RVW

The only thing surprising about this movie is it hasn’t been made before now. It’s such an amazing & inspirational story that tells itself.

Miracle

What’s more:

The thing about inspirational sports movies is that if they are made well it doesn’t matter that you know the outcome, doesn’t matter that they are full of clichés. Miracle is such a case.

It hits all the marks, does everything you expect, yet is still good stuff because, hey, the story is fantastic.

Miracle

Quick thoughts:
  • Kurt Russell has a really good Minnesotan accent. Or at least what I think of as Minnesotan…
  • Good young actors and the hockey action is perfection. So well executed.
  • Interesting choice to retain the original commentary by Al Michaels & Ken Dryden. It works quite well, as the Michaels is a good play by play man and does well in the historic moment.
  • The ending voiceover by Russell is totally unneccesary and pushes the schmaltz meter into the red, where it surprisingly really hasn’t been for most of the movie. The story is enough, you don’t need to tell us why it was important – we know.
  • The end credits have a nice dedication to Herb Brooks, who died before the film was completed, and in a nice touch list what the players are doing now.

Miracle

Poster:

Trailer:

Bechdel Test:

Fail

Main Cast Kurt Russell Herb Brooks, Patricia Clarkson Patti Brooks, Nathan West Rob McClanahan, Noah Emmerich Craig Patrick
Rating PG
Release Date Fri 06 Feb 2004 UTC
Director Gavin O’Connor
Genres Drama, Family, History, Sport
Plot Miracle tells the true story of Herb Brooks (Russell), the player-turned-coach who led the 1980 U.S. Olympic hockey team to victory over the seemingly invincible Russian squad.
Poster Miracle
Runtime 135
Tagline What America needed was a miracle. What it got was a hockey game.
Writers Eric Guggenheim (written by)
Year 2004

February 19, 2014Filed Under: Movies, Reviews Tagged With: 2004

Dead Men Don’t Wear Plaid (1980)

#140RVW

Less a movie than a film school exercise as Steve Martin remixes old noir films with even older one-liners. Still works more often than not.

Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid

What’s more:

On paper this really shouldn’t work; inserting yourself into a bunch of old movies and making smart ass remarks. It would be sort of like having a bunch of guys sitting in the audience and heckling a movie and just showing the backs of their heads…wait a second…

Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid

But it does work, because the year is 1982 and Steve Martin is about the funniest person on the planet. Some of the jokes work very well, my favorite being a running gag scolding Bogart for not wearing a tie. Many others are just rote smarmy responses that simply advance the story. Actually, it’s probably true to say that while this exercise in remixing old films works, it isn’t funny so much as irreverent.

Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid

The concept of mashing up old films into a new film is intriguing, though. I’m sure someone will make (and probably already has) a truly unique project this way, though it will probably never see the light of day for rights reasons…

Poster:

Trailer:

Bechdel Test:

Fail

Main Cast Steve Martin Rigby Reardon, Rachel Ward Juliet Forrest, Alan Ladd The Exterminator (archive footage), Carl Reiner Field Marshall VonKluck
Rating PG
Release Date Fri 21 May 1982 UTC
Director Carl Reiner
Genres Comedy, Crime, Mystery, Thriller
Plot Film noir parody with a detective uncovering a sinister plot. Characters from real noirs appear as scenes from various films are intercut.
Poster Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid
Runtime 88
Tagline Laugh… or I’ll blow your lips off!
Writers Carl Reiner (written by) &, George Gipe (written by) …
Year 1982

February 18, 2014Filed Under: Movies, Reviews Tagged With: 1982

The World’s End (2013)

#140RVW

Absolute riot. So much fun. Park & Wright can do little wrong. Works pretty well as sci-fi & as comedy, but mostly as story about friends…

The World's End
Gary King: “I think you bit off more than you can chew with Earth, mate.”
Andrew Knightley: “Yeah, because we’re more belligerent, more stubborn and more idiotic than you could ever imagine.”

What’s more:

As the third film in the Cornetto Trilogy (with Shaun of the Dead and Hot Fuzz), The World’s End comes with heavy expectations, which it absolutely fulfills. Producer Nira Park & director Edgar Wright get the band back together and this thing just plays…

The World's End

The perpetually funny Simon Pegg & Nick Frost are joined this time by a great supporting cast featuring Eddie Marsan, Paddy Considine, Rosamund Pike and NVB fave Martin Freeman. These actors gel perfectly and completely sell their role as old friends.

The World's End

At the insistence of Pegg’s ne’er do well addict Gary King, the old gang gets together in their old hometown to complete a pub crawl down the “Golden Mile” of 12 pubs that they failed to master as teenagers. The first half of the film is packed with great comedy and moments as they realize that of course you can’t go home again.

The World's End

And if it had stopped there, it would have been quite a good movie. They could have left it at that and no one would have cause for complaint. But the whole thing gets more sublime as this theme that nothing stays the same becomes more explicit with the discovery that their hometown has in fact been invaded by body snatching aliens. Brilliant! It gets completely ridiculous, and in all the right ways.

The World's End

The World’s End is a blast and never stops being funny, even with a slightly long for comedy 109 minute run-time. The movie feels like a night out with your friends, and makes me want to get the band back together to find our own Golden Mile and “see this through to the bitter end. Or… lager end.” Let’s Boo-Boo…

Poster:

Trailer:

Bechdel Test:

Fail

Main Cast Simon Pegg Gary King, Nick Frost Andy Knightley, Martin Freeman Oliver Chamberlain, Rosamund Pike Sam Chamberlain
Rating R
Release Date Fri 23 Aug 2013 UTC
Director Edgar Wright
Genres Action, Comedy, Sci-Fi
Plot Five friends who reunite in an attempt to top their epic pub crawl from 20 years earlier unwittingly become humankind’s only hope for survival.
Poster The World's End
Runtime 109
Tagline Good food. Fine ales. Total Annihilation.
Writers Simon Pegg (written by) &, Edgar Wright (written by)
Year 2013

February 17, 2014Filed Under: Movies, Reviews Tagged With: 2013

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